Grief is an Ocean
The waves are enormous at first and knock you breathless
Grief. We’re all familiar with it. If you’re not, you’re one of the lucky few. Greif touches every part of our lives near and far. Whether it’s the grief over the death of a loved one, a pet, or a close friend, we all have some experience with it.
It’s a constant, unfortunately, the older you get. I’m at the age where I’ve had grandparents, a father and a younger sibling pass away. I’m only in my 40s.
I know this is a depressing topic, so I’m going to approach it with as much sensitivity as possible. If you’re triggered, I’d recommend placing this aside for later. There are no hard truths here, just experiences.
In my 40+ years of being here, I’ve lost many pets and, as said above, many family members. My sister was the hardest. She was the youngest of all of us and she was about to turn 28. I have a fairly large family, so as you can guess, we were very distraught.
Now, this is where I try to be as sensitive as possible. I read something a while back on Reddit (linked here for those that want the original post), talking about grief. This is how I address it now after having read this gentleman's words.
We’re in an ocean with others, but sometimes it seems like we’re alone in that vast, sometimes stormy place. It’s scary to be there when you think you’re alone.
But you’re not alone.
Grief comes in waves. At first, they’ll be overwhelming, and crash over you until you can’t breathe. You think you won’t make it without this someone in your life. Those waves will come fast and furious at first, leaving you sputtering for air and grasping at anything that will pull you up from the dark waters.
Over time, though not making them less important, you’ll find the waves will come less and less. That doesn’t mean they’re gone from your life completely. A smell, taste, sound — these are all things that can bring waves.
Each person who passes leaves a scar behind, and those scars, though they may seem ugly, are a testament to the life they lived, and the life you need to live for them after they’re gone.
“Stay unfiltered and loud, you’ll be proud of that skin full of scars.” P!NK All I know So Far.
I know it’s a hard and treacherous path to follow when coming out of grief. Take your time. Be kind to yourself. Be generous to others, and they will help you through the tough times.
You’re not alone. There are other boats in that ocean that will moor nearby and support you.
